Why do groups keep up stories everyone knows are false—where each person sees the truth but pretends not to? Why do we tolerate polite hypocrisy, subtle bribes, half-hidden threats, or strategic flirtation? As someone wired for blunt honesty, I've long been baffled by these layers of social theater that seem to breed confusion and harm.
Steven Pinker's new book takes this puzzle apart with his trademark clarity, drawing on research in evolution, linguistics, and game theory—from the prisoner's dilemma to "The Emperor's New Clothes." He argues that shared fictions and mutual pretense aren't just signs of human weakness; they are tools that keep social life running. Sometimes truth is too volatile, and a bit of collective make-believe prevents conflict or preserves dignity.
What's most compelling is how Pinker turns apparent irrationality into evidence of strategic intelligence. The very evasions that frustrate literal-minded people serve an adaptive purpose, softening the blunt edges of honesty in complex societies. In an age flooded with misinformation, the book offers a sharp framework for seeing when concealment unites and when it corrupts.
Nothing has changed how I think about communication this profoundly since Kahneman's Thinking, Fast and Slow. This is Pinker at his best—precise, surprising, and deeply relevant. 5/5 stars.